


bfdi but fucked up

by Linkle



Category: Battle For Dream Island (Web Series)
Genre: Hell, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-08
Updated: 2019-01-08
Packaged: 2019-10-06 14:03:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,764
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17346536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Linkle/pseuds/Linkle
Summary: in a world... where they battled for dream island.. but FUCKED UP





	bfdi but fucked up

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Josiah OOOOOOUUGGHHHG wassupthis is paige gay rights

Ice cube be like lesbian this is true hey check this out

Speakerbox tells me to kill myself  
One day Pen was feeling horny. “Hey Eraser im horny” he said. “Lets fuck” said blocky

My name is Yfael which is leafy backwards but backwards because im twisted and FUCKED UP i kill and eat people to survive i have to it’s my curse because i called God a slur. But im still christian because jesus died for me but i would not DIE for him evil leafy is my tulpa and my girlfriend *smacks her ass hard* Yeah we’re gay if you have a problem with it you can *does fifty cool poses with my giant fucking gun and then tears your face off and shoots it* 

Donut, however, was dying of flesh-eating strep. “Ow,” Donut said, as the fesh melted off his supple, voluptuous hips, “this really sucks. I don’t like this.” He tried to walk to a hospital but he found that the strep had eaten away his leg muscles. “God d*mn.” he cursed. He didn’t like to curse but sometimes he just had to.  
“Oh my fucking christ, Donut,” said Gelatin, who had been the person to infect him. “Did you just censor what you said in real life? You’re such a pussy.”  
“Gelatin, I am dying.” Donut responded as one of his doughy lungs ruptured.  
“What kind of fucking dipshit does THAT, you stinky ball asshole taint?” said Adam Katz, voice of Nickel from Inanimate Insanity. “Gelatin’s right. You really are such a pussy. I hate you. Go die.”  
“I love my wife,” said Ice Cube  
While he was being battered by insults, Donut had managed to saw off the infected leg and was shoving it into an inconspicuous garbage bag. “Maybe I will, Mr. Katz.” he murmured. “Maybe I will…” He then rushed off into the forest, blood dribbling out of the leg stump. Gelatin laughed at him as he left, and then, curious little goblin that he was, lapped up the infected blood left behind.  
“Oh my god Gelatin, are you a moron? Are you an idiot? Are you a kpoppie?” asked Adam, incredulously. He couldn’t believe that his two time by Jack Stauber fortnite doubles partner would do something like that. He had no choice but to call the jiggly little man a slur.  
“ADAM!!!!! WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT TO ME!!!” Gelatin screeched, but before he could bring it to fisticuffs he started to feel the symptoms set in. First, the strep concentrated on his core, eating away at his heart and liver and hard-earned bones. He could feel his gentle gelatin skin start to crumble away. “Adam!” he yodeled, “Adam I need your help now more than ever!?”  
“You should have thought about that before you sold our Coca-Cola shares,” Adam said, as he kicked Gelatin clean in the solar plexus. “Perish before me like the stray pigeon you are, you dirty, backstabbing lime-flavored shithead.”  
“ADAAAAAAAAAAAAM MY SOLAR PLEXUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUS” Gelatin screeched. He could feel something in his voice box shifting, extra teeth forming among the gooey folds of sugar-flesh. “I AM GOING TO DIE HERE! I HAVE COME TO TERMS WITH THIS! BUT MY DAUGHTER NEEDS A FATHER AND GOD DAMMIT I’;M NOT GOING TO LEAVE HER WITHOUT ONE!” He coulf feel his skin becoming dryer, flaking into bits, his head becoming more rational, less fun-loving. “Oh my god I’m becoming a tsukkomi…” he murmured. “I can’t do it. I can’t live like this.” His jaw crumbled, as did his center, leaving him with a hole in the middle to speak out of. “I’ve becpome my worst nightmare. I’ve become Donut. You have to kill me, Adam.” He look up at his former friend, tears welling in his eyes. He could tell his voice was already starting to sound like it had been altered in Audacity. “Please. I;m beggign yuo ;; “  
Adam glared down at the pastry-wiggly dessert abomination. “Oh, Gelatin. Poor sweet Gelatin.” He gave a cruel smile and threw a PAC-MAN band-aid at Gelatin’s malformed face. “Killing you would be too easy. **Killing you would mean you’d win.** ” He took out his trusty machete and hacked away Gelatin’s ankles before striding away, turning back one last time. “You know what I’ll do? I’ll let you live. I’ll let you experience life as the freak you were inside from the start. Hell, I’ll even take your daughter. Raise her as my own.” He spat at Gelatin, if Gelatin could even still be called that, as he was beginning to look more and more like the suffering Donut had before his abscondence. “And then tell her the truth, and it will break her heart. You’ll be sorry, Gelatin. And I’ll never forgive you.”  
He tossed his skin away behind him and walked off into the sunset, chortling and saying gamer words all the way.

“Fuck yeah”  
Eraser put his CENSORED in Pen’s CENSORED. It was hot.  
“OH yeah eraser fuck me like the stupid dogboy bottom bitch i am” said four  
“Youre not part of this orgy” said Blocky  
“Im kin with pen” said Four  
“Can I be kin with pen too” said pen  
“You are pen you bimbo” said 8 ball  
“Wanna titfuck me” said four to 8ball  
“No”  
“Ok”  
9 months later pen gave birth to moonrise 2880 dc. Four was jealous. “I want a baby” said four  
“Im baby call 911” said x memeishly  
“I have an idea  
Hey whats going on in this thread i said it’s me y.aefy i need to kill fifty humans with my bloodstained katana (that’s japanese for sword) or else the devil will fuck my mom and i cANT let that happena gain. Im gonna steal Pen’s baby”  
Four broke into pen’s house in the middle of the nioght and stole moonrise and ate him alive the end… or was it the beginning?????

Contestants get to have all the fun  
If you’re on the show you’ve already won  
Now that I no longer compete  
I feel incomplete  
Taking part in the action  
Made for easy interaction  
my anus is bleeding  
With friends  
And nothing was the same  
Once it wasn’t just a game  
I never wanted it to end  
I hoped that I could feel alive  
Poop  
Lets kill all horny people” Firey said to leafy  
Leafy swallowed hard. If only firey knew... she was horny. ‘  
“Hey whats wrong” said pin  
Leafy ran away screamign  
She killed a small animal while she was hiding in the woods  
Dribbling pussy  
Anyway back to the story Leafy was so horny. She decided to take her mind off it she ate yoylecake but she ate so much she bwooomfed  
She thought it was so sexy  
“AW SERIOUSLY?”  
“Yes, seriously, you have to keep eating”  
Josiah reached into his McDonalds bag and took out another Quarter Pounder with Cheese, the fiftieth he had gotten that night, and shoved it in David’s eager mouth. David protested meekly, bratty bottom that he was, but they both knew it was all for show. That stick figure liked nothing more than becoming a big sloshy circle, going from straight line to gay round.  
“N-N-!” David started. But his thoughts melted away as the gooey warm processed cheese-type goodness topping the burger filled his scribbly mouth and heart and libido.  
I cant Liv Im not strong enough  
:(

“Can we go HOME now?” Firey Jr. said like a fucking tiny bitch. 

“Stop asking that already, you fucking tiny bitch” Naily said to her fucking tiny bitch of a friend.

“That’s the first time I asked that today, though!” Firey Jr. said in his bitchiest and tiniest voice “Before I asked “Can we go home NOW?”, and before that I asked “Can we GO home now?”, and-”

“God tests me every day. He tests us all because he wants us to live our best lives and we can’t know what’s best for us if we don’t experience what’s worst. He tempts us. Tempts us to just lose it. Lose our morals, lose ourselves, lose what makes us sentient beings. Lose ourselves to mindless mania and indulgence. Tempting us every day with the tantalizing choice to stop living as people and to live as tools, weapons, mindless objects that brutalize and flay. Wouldn’t that be simpler? A machine can’t suffer. A machine won’t know pain. A machine just fulfills its purpose without question or regrets. But no. That’s easy path, the wrong path, the one God nudges us to because he knows we’re better. I will be better. I will not give in, God. I’ll stay with you.” Naily said

 

Cum on my nipples bitch boy  
“Why is my dick so small” lamented snowball. Was it because he refused to pee inside lightning? Did lightning talk to god to make god make him make snowballs cock tiny as punishment.  
“God isnt real fuck you” said a brony  
“So who can I blame on this” Snowball said about to beat the shit out of Fries i mean the brony  
“Just go jerk off to straight porn you idiot it will make your weewee bigger” said speakerbox who came back for some reason  
Gelatin eats meat hes a carnivore  
Aquarium Pacidomi is a vegan  
It is the rambling of a crackhead  
“Being asexual totally makes you queer” said foldy “just because I have sex with Stapy doesn't make me not asexual. Which i am, and that makes me queer”

Hhey there youtubers haha it’s me nickel here! Back with part three of, my pokemon emerald nuzlocke. In the uh last episode we uh, finally got to be able to choose our starter! And i asked you all in the comments to tell me what to pick and of course, no one did, because no one commented, but that’s fine because i was. Probably gonna pick mudkip anyways haha! Ha. 

Four lifted up his ass seductively as he picked up the spilled tic tacs that had minion faces printed on them. He then opened his asshole, WHICH HE DOES HAVE SHIRLEY AND WOLFY, goatse style, and slammed his butthole on the floor so he sucked the minions up his ass like all the furries fantasize about. “That’s how you do ASS VORE!!” He said triumphantly.  
“AW SERIOUSLY?” Said David.

The Mysterious MR Enter read this document and went into a depressive episode for 2 days  
Not in this house  
D se DabJosiabv

Cool clothes plus attitude plus new hand moves and dab  
And dab  
And dab and dab and dab

look at this cool image  
Divide with his wang out is ok <\--- dimitri said this google it  
Yeah i did say that  
Divide has two Ds in his name because  
The ds stand for Dragon dildo right?

Dimitri be like I think we should all be horny

Dimitri i just wabt to let you know that the thought of king showstopper and aurel valentine from my comic being fuckbuddies crossed my mind and i dont know how to feel about that  
H  
es really horny

 

We should like. Unite all our ocs and shit for a death batt  
Le

BRING IT IN EVERYBODY every oc of everyone in after hours comes together for the greatest birthday party in the world  
No one wins in that scensrio

We cant because aquarium would just win

Actually aquarium dies when moonrise drinks everything and bwooomfs  
Moonrisew isbt the bwoomf boy thats josiah dickhead

FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
My ocs judst end up killing themselves befoire sanythunbg hapens  
Im havibg a stroke  
This is bfdi season 5  
Thats bad. Fuck galaga  
Galaga ship would never do this. She would never let this happen  
Anyway LKeafy was like imm so horny lick ,my feet and Josiah was like fuck yoy bitvh *pulls pout a gun*  
Im very tired and i cant be assed to type so no  
Besides pussy!  
:):shoesize:  
:)  
Mcdonald’s + is the most important meal of the day  
I TAB OUT FOR TWO MINUTES  
Cake: What was that loser? I couldnt hear you over the sound of my massive footsteps  
Loser; i sAid  
Loser; yoU caNt wIn mE i cAnt Be bEat  
Cake: Huh?  
Loser; I woNt hUrt You  
Loser; SenD piCks Of fEet  
Cake: :D! I can do that! *does that*  
Loser; thAnk You My wOndErfUl hUsbAnd CakE yoU haVe mAde My lAst Two HouRs aLivE thE haPpiEst Two Of mY liFe  
Cake: Oh, Losey! I’m going to miss you so! Why oh why did you have to catch dumb bitch disease!

Feeling not thinking, Cake ran over to embrace his only ever love. Unfortunately he’s a notorious himbo, and accidentally trampled Loser with his inflated giant sexy feet and toesies. Cake would live the rest of his days drowning in guilt, but wouldn’t learn until he himself joined Loser in heaven… that was the only way Loser ever wanted to die :)

You cant win me  
I cant be beat  
Giant sexy  
Inflated feet  
I didn’t mention it up above in the Josiah/David wg fic but david’s feet were also big and sexy and inflated there  
My urethra is swollen shut  
plese help me said God to Four  
“No die” says four  
Thats what happened in 2012  
I wish I was in my Bruni Mars tulpa’s condo in Manhattan  
Put. thjids in moma,

Abuse apologists are worth shit

The door of the Burger Kurger jingle-jangled as a cloaked stranger with a trash bag came inside. Taco perked up at the register. “Hey Taco,” she yelled into the kitchen. “We have a customer.”  
“Wot?” Taco yelled back Britly.  
“I SAID, we have a FUCKIN CUSTOMER!” Taco screeched. “Jesus! Don’t you know how to read with your ears or some shit!”  
“Oy govna,” Taco murmured from among the countless apple papples and double dippies. “Give ‘em the queen’s chow.”  
“Cool! I don’t know what that means! Choke or something!” Taco held up the middle finger to the window to the kitchen for three minutes before turning around and grinning perkily at the round, shadowy figure who had been patiently waiting at the counter for 10 minutes now. “Hi! Welcome to Burger Kurger, where fucking is punishable by death!” She pulled out her work shotgun to make a point. “So you better not be horny! Please! I’m so tired!”  
“You got chicken nunget ?” The figure whispered.  
“Yeah hold on a sec,” Taco muttered spitefully before trudging into the back and flipping British Taco off directly to her face and coming back to the counter. “Nah, we’re all out. Can I get you anything else?”  
The figure slammed the trash bag down on the counter with a wet slap. “Nuggets. Now. Use my meat.” Taco couldn’t see the figure’s eyes but she was sure they were shooting her a rage face-worthy glare.  
“Dude, don’t make me use the work gun.” She popped the safety off. “Explain yourself before you gotta explain it to god or something. You have five seconds. Don’t waste more of my sorry little life.” She fired a warning shot into the nearest booth to prove her point, and also because it was the only fun she ever got on the job. (this part’s not done yet)Hey guys it’s yfael here once again here with my sponsership deal from GamersJuice dot Inc i have to suppress my rage and sell YOu yes YOu yes you in front of the screen this delicious gamer flavored gamer girl pee and if you by my delicious and mostly health-board approved product right fucking now mario will come to your house and well he wont do anything he’ll just stand in the doorway for like fifteen long awkward mnutes but aaAUAUGHGH *my inner mind demon who looks like Vegeta from Dragon Ball Z red and naked and a scaly comes out and he kills me and now the world is fucking doomed look what happnes* Listen to me you pugnacious, impotent, f*cking shell of a … shell  
I need my f*cking mcnuggest RIGHT mcF*CKING 8NOW* and i wim crawl from the furthest depths of burning heCK and stab you through your miserable worthless eyes using my dessicated skeleton hands because all my flesh melted off in my disease, and i will crawl into your skull and forces you to make my f*cking nuggets via specialized brain slapps  
b*tch  
Cjizzum  
Cum  
Cum  
jizzard  
Cum  
Piss  
Dick and balls xD’  
I think im in hell right now!  
I fuck the bfdi  
I make it cum  
I fuck the bfdi with my serpent tongue


End file.
